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Nothing to see here... move along.

I'm serious, there is nothing to see here. Really. Moving along is in your best interest, not mine. This is probably one of the most boring pages you've ever stared at, if not the most.

Hopefully you're gone by now, who would keep reading this garbage? If I were in your position, I certainly wouldn't. But unfortunately I am not in your position, and I am not blissfully avoiding boring pages. I, sadly, am the one creating those boring pages. Please forgive me. I would apologize for having you read this farkel, but I warned you and told you to leave. So that would be your bad. Your B, not mine.

Are you still here? Why? A better question: why am I still typing this steaming load? Does this bring me pleasure? I don't think so... and it certainly doesn't bring YOU pleasure. How could THIS ever bring anyone pleasure? Maybe you're a masochist? Ah, great! So THAT'S why I'm making this page! For the enjoyment and entertainment of masochists around the world! Haha! I'm supporting a form of insanity! I figure I must be some type of insane, so why not support the other types? To those masochists still reading- you're welcome.

You know, I looked at this page before, and it was pretty horrible. Worse than this, if that's even possible. No, it isn't. Maybe it wasn't that bad. But I deleted everything and replaced it with nothing. Then I just started typing. And here we are now... my, what a journey it has been. This is an experience to remember- like hiking Everest without any of the grandeur... or exercise for that matter. Had you ever wondered what it's like to climb Everest? It's a lot like reading this- at first it's not that bad, you see the warning signs, and you start up the mountain. Soon after you start, you realize climbing a mountain is hard and it sucks. But you know at the end, at the top of that peak, that payoff will make it all worth it. Being on top of the world, seeing that view, taking that selfie... all of this makes that terrible climb worth it. That amazing payoff.

...except at the end of this page, there is no payoff. That's right, you read through all of that junk for nothing. Like climbing all the way to the top of Everest, only to find a sherpa who tells you "Surprise! It was a scam! There is no Mt. Everest, no one actually gets this far! So... go home now."

Yeah, that's what this page is like.