Mellow Ezlo
Spoony Bard
I hate myself
I am a terrible person.
I really hurt her. She isn't even looking forward to anything now.
I am a terrible partner
I refuse to listen to you tell yourself that kind of stuff anymore. Did you not listen to anything anybody said yesterday? Posting about your guilt day after day is never going to make you feel better, it's just going to make you feel worse and worse. Seriously. Stop this. It's not true, and it never will be true.
If you need to, talk to her. You'll never feel better if you make yourself feel like the bad guy, which is exactly what posting in here does.