...What happened to the Happy Thread? I actually had something really happy to post, but now this completely ruined my mood. I want the Happy Thread back!
I won't tell anyone but I' terrified, some days even depressed. I am starting college in 10 days. While I am excited, I am still so so so nervous. About a year ago, I started having these really awful anxiety attacks. Every day I would wake up with that feeling in the back of my throat when a sob is caught. My heart was always racing, and basic human interactions set me over the edge. But in April I finally starting dating this really wonderful guy, who I had confided in during the worst months of the attacks. Once we started talking about dating and taking the friendship further, my attacks went away. He is and was my best friend. He is a year younger than I, so needless to say, he has to complete his senior year of high-school. My worries are not about the relationship withstanding, because quite frankly, we are so perfect together that I don't think anything could tear us apart. Cheesy, I know. My real fear is that I have become dependent on him for happiness and security. I worry that a phone call won't be enough to calm me down during an episode. Granted I will only be an hour from home, but that's an hour that he can't possibly drive every time I have an episode. I guess I'm just really really nervous.
I suppose I've been a little unhappy. Things have been piling up on me. Im having issues with my family, my phone isnt really working anymore and I'm unable to get a new one, and i have the most terrible luck with guys. But even though things have been rough, im holding my head up high. And besides, my cat had three teeny tiny kittens today and they are so precious!
RAIN STOP COMMING PLIZ JUST SHTOP.