I want to cry. I want to end myself because of this. Dealing with friend problems. I don't want to have enemies. I don't want to lose friends. I don't want to be left alone. I don't want one of my friends to be left alone.
I don't want any of my friends to be alone. I want to be together, forever. But that won't happen, apparently.
I just hate myself a lot. It's my fault. It's my fault that this is happening. I can't feel normal. I feel insane.
Vio, there are times when I need to slap people like you in the face. I am ashamed that you would think this stupid thing, you are so blind! However your friends act it is not your fault at all. Do you understand? If they will isolate themselves, or decline your friendship then that is their choice and you have absolutely no power over that. You cannot keep thinking that its your fault for things like these, because you have no control over their actions! You are stressed, and life is hard for you, but if you are going to think really foolish things then you need a slap in the face. Quit beating yourself up, and just let it pass. You can't make life perfect, Vio, there will be suffering without a doubt, so the only way to deal with it is to persevere. If something happens with your friends, it was not your fault, they made the choice to do whatever they did.
