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Let Us Bring Logic! (not to Be Taken Seriously)

Joined
Jan 27, 2011
1. why is it that Hyrule keeps rearranging their villages and cities?

2. where the hell is Kokori forest we don't see it anymore

3. why does Zelda have pictures of Peach, Yoshi, Mario and Luigi?

4. why does that mask salesman have a Mario mask and where did it come from?

5. what are redeads really supposed to be? some kinds of zombies that somehow lost their colors?

6. ya know, that goron in Zora's Domain in TP should have drowned according to MM

7. why doesn't Zelda try to take down Ganondorf on her own? i mean if he keeps knocking her out it's obvious that he's awre that Zelda is apparently more powerful than he is

8. EPONA IS INVINCABLE!

9. why do the market guys never give Link things for free, i mean he has a sword and shield you would think they'd be afraid of him, just havehim take the sword out and he should be given what he wants for free

10. why do we need Navi?

11. those guys in Lon Lon Ranch look way too much like Mario and Luigi, relations maybe?

12. why does everyone live in a cave in the original Zelda?

13. what happened to Error?

14. if there's no female gorons how do they reproduce? is it like the Nameks from Dragon Ball where they puke out eggs?

15. what the hell are the Ooccoos supposed to be a half human half bird? i'd hate to imagine how they began

16. how does wearing a blue tunic suddenly make it so that you don't drown? there's no scuba gear that comes with it of any kind, is it like a body equipment from an RPG? blue tunic increases your defense twards water by 100%?
 

Majora's Cat

How about that
Joined
Sep 3, 2010
Location
NJ
Logic? Who needs logic? To a franchise like Zelda, logic is dead weight. In fact, not many video games really consider logic, as they probably don't believe that fans will go so far as to theorize about this and that. On top of that, The Legend of Zelda is a fantasy series, so why should Nintendo have to pay attention to every detail? If they did so, no locations would be a mystery. We'd all know exactly where this location is (in other Zelda games) and how it came to be. When everything becomes logical, the Zelda games are ruined and Zelda theorizers and people of the like will have nothing to discuss.
 

Satsy

~~SaturnStorm
Joined
Aug 24, 2010
Location
Somewhere small
1: To improve their 'Feng Shui' (or the Hylian equivalent). After all if they keep coming under attack their chi must be right out!

2: The Kokiri left the forest and became Hylian businessmen.

3: She won them at a Smash Bros tournament. She has their statues deeper in the castle...

4: That's not a mask, that's his face. :O

5: They're really just shy stalfos. They covered themselves in mud to try to look more like people.

6: In Termina they sink. In Hyrule they float. Fear for the Goron that is in any land between those two.

7: Zelda has learned etiquette, and its not polite to hit an invader, y'know.

8: Epona has all of the power stars.

9: They're not afraid 'cause they have guns under their tunics.

10: She is the light to Link's... I dunno. Some sort of bright joke.

11: In some strange plot twist, they are descendants.

12: Caves are the new castles. We'll go that way in a few years mark my words!

13: He was an error no more.

14: They build their young out of old Gorons.

15: Oddly enough their ancestors weren't chicken or human/hylian. A shark and a Patchyosaur should not have been able to produce that.

16: Blue tunic comes with an oxygen tank. And hey! If Mario in SM64 can breathe through a foot then why the heck not.
 

Shadsie

Sage of Tales
HOORAY! A worldbuilding topic! I'm a fanfic writer - I'm good that this. I lampshade and try to explain away stuff like this in my deriviative works all the time. Let's have fun with this!

1. why is it that Hyrule keeps rearranging their villages and cities?

The Goddess Din keeps geologic and siesmic "disruptors" throughout the land, by which she rearranges the landscape at will. The cities and villages of course must move to accomadate the shifting landscape. This also explains why Hyrule has such a small population - many deaths from frequent, massive earthquakes.

2. where the hell is Kokori forest we don't see it anymore

It is the Faron Woods and Ordon Village area in TP, or the Lost Woods in A Link to the Past, etc. Settled by other races (Hylians/humans). The Kokiri are still around in small numbers, they just hide themselves in deep, secret places and mostly are just invisible. They are like fey now, visible only to those who search and trust. Most people stop seeing and believing in them after they reach a certain age of their childhoods.

3. why does Zelda have pictures of Peach, Yoshi, Mario and Luigi?

Hyrule and The Mushroom Kingdom are different universes, but sometimes, universes connect. One can argue that this happens in our own world whenever someone reads or writes a piece of fiction. Tales of the Mushroom Kingdom are in Hyrule's books - the childhood bedtime stories that little Zelda loved to read. So, she has pictures of her favorite literary characters up in her bedroom.

Or maybe video games exist in Hyrule and we are never allowed to know it. They run on magic there.

4. why does that mask salesman have a Mario mask and where did it come from?

It is either the mask of a storybook character that is a favorite among children in Hyrule, or the Happy Mask Salesman can travel between dimensions and picked up a mask of the Mushroom Kingdom's greatest hero along the way.

5. what are redeads really supposed to be? some kinds of zombies that somehow lost their colors?

Have you ever seen an unwrapped mummy? The skin is discolored/dark both from the drying process and from the resins the ancient embalmers used. We know from Majora's Mask that ReDeads are probably Gibdos without their wrappings. I personally enjoy fictionizing that they are the remains of the honored dead - members of Hyrule's royal family, past forgotten heroes and once-notable names whose remains were given the honor of mummification in order to "keep these great people with us in a way." Unfortunately, when evils rise up in the land, evil magic will somtimes seep into the tombs and re-animate corpses. The spirits of the original people are not there, however, it's just magic animating the bodies. Stalfos happen the same way.


6. ya know, that goron in Zora's Domain in TP should have drowned according to MM

Termina is an alternate universe. It doesn't always share Hyrule's physics, nor it's paralell-people its biology.

7. why doesn't Zelda try to take down Ganondorf on her own? i mean if he keeps knocking her out it's obvious that he's awre that Zelda is apparently more powerful than he is

Wisdom is a way of peace. It is not the place of wisdom to be violent. Zelda's domain is in wisdom, magic and peace. She occasionally fights when it comes down to the wire, but it would seem that it is her divenely appointed place to wait while it is the divinely appointed place of a rough peasant-boy to take out the trash. Perhaps Zelda and Ganondorf are actually equal in power - his is for conquest, hers lies in barrier magic/protection. For her to really knock-down drag-fight in Link-fashion may require her to redirect the massive amount of power she puts into the "general protection" of her land - and thus, more and worse monsters roaming around and more deaths among her citizens than the "wait on the Hero" plan.

I don't know. I just pulled that out of my tail.

8. EPONA IS INVINCABLE!

Oh, this is my bug-a-boo. I work with horses in real life. They are much more fragile in real life than fiction would have you believe. Epona can run forever, never strays - comes when called, can remained saddled perpetually without developing sores or fungal infections, doesn't ever throw a shoe, never colics... can take an arrow to the head....

Epona is a magic pony or a robot. Only explainations.

9. why do the market guys never give Link things for free, i mean he has a sword and shield you would think they'd be afraid of him, just havehim take the sword out and he should be given what he wants for free

Swordsmanship seems to be rather common in Hyrule. It's like guns in the Old West. The saloon didn't give anyone their drinks for free just because they had a gun on their belt. In modern times, donut shops don't give freebies to cops *all* the time just because they wear guns. Same applies to swords and Hyrule. Link is an honorable swordsman. He's not going to threaten innocent people just to get stuff. He respects Hyrule's capitalist economy.

10. why do we need Navi?

Nintendo assumes that the first time player of OoT is young and stupid and needs a persistent guide. In-game... well, Link is both lonely and sane. A companion that takes care of both of those conditions was needed.

11. those guys in Lon Lon Ranch look way too much like Mario and Luigi, relations maybe?

They are parallel selves. What did I say earlier about other dimensions?

12. why does everyone live in a cave in the original Zelda?

Ganon and his reign destroyed the economy, the cities, the towns, and everything. The remaining citizens live in abject terror. They dare not build houses for fear of monsters, so they run a literal underground resistance hidden among the trappings of nature.

13. what happened to Error?

He was corrected.

14. if there's no female gorons how do they reproduce? is it like the Nameks from Dragon Ball where they puke out eggs?

Goron females exist. They are indistiguishable to the eyes of outsiders from the males. Sexing Gorons is hard work and involves a Katamari.

15. what the hell are the Ooccoos supposed to be a half human half bird? i'd hate to imagine how they began

They are incomprehensible cosmic beings. Seriously, this is the most benign form they could take to the eyes of mortals. Either that, or the Goddesses of Hyrule love chickens.

One of my stories (in all seirousness) had them as beings that were genetically engineered to incubate the eggs containing the firstborns of the in-turn genetically engineereed races of Hyrule. It is natural to want chicken-like creatures to incubate eggs.

16. how does wearing a blue tunic suddenly make it so that you don't drown? there's no scuba gear that comes with it of any kind, is it like a body equipment from an RPG? blue tunic increases your defense twards water by 100%?

Twilight Princess made things more realistic. As for the original OoT tunic, I'd say that the blue fabric is enchanted and, adhering to Link's skin, transferrs oxygen from the water right into his blood via his pores.
 

insanity76

I don't suffer from it ..
Joined
Jun 17, 2010
Location
Texas
1. why is it that Hyrule keeps rearranging their villages and cities?

--Because the zoning laws in Hyrule keep changing.

2. where the hell is Kokori forest we don't see it anymore

--It was lost and forgotten within the Lost Woods, thus becoming a Stalfos.

3. why does Zelda have pictures of Peach, Yoshi, Mario and Luigi?

--She's a huge Mario Kart fan.

4. why does that mask salesman have a Mario mask and where did it come from?

--He accidentally played the Song of Healing one day when a disgruntled plumber was at his house fixing his sink.

5. what are redeads really supposed to be? some kinds of zombies that somehow lost their colors?

--They're former contestants from Dancing With the Stars. Their discoloring is to hide their identities.

6. ya know, that goron in Zora's Domain in TP should have drowned according to MM

--He was wearing invisible floaties.

7. why doesn't Zelda try to take down Ganondorf on her own? i mean if he keeps knocking her out it's obvious that he's awre that Zelda is apparently more powerful than he is

--If she did that, Link would have nothing to do, so he'd end up spending all day at the fishing hole and end up catching all the fish.

8. EPONA IS INVINCABLE!

--It's something in the grass at Lon Lon Ranch. After all the cows are invincible too.

9. why do the market guys never give Link things for free, i mean he has a sword and shield you would think they'd be afraid of him, just havehim take the sword out and he should be given what he wants for free

--Like most shop owners, they have a gun behind the counter, so they like their chances.

10. why do we need Navi?

--It was either her or Kaepora Gaebora tagging along with you on Link's entire adventure. Would you rather have his unavoidable & unskippable 1,000 word essays every time you Z target an enemy?

11. those guys in Lon Lon Ranch look way too much like Mario and Luigi, relations maybe?

--Yes, first cousins twice removed.

12. why does everyone live in a cave in the original Zelda?

--It's a secret to everybody.

13. what happened to Error?

--He left Hyrule and set off to find his long lost brother, Trial.

14. if there's no female gorons how do they reproduce? is it like the Nameks from Dragon Ball where they puke out eggs?

--Kaepora Gaebora plays the role of the stork to deliver baby Gorons to them.

15. what the hell are the Ooccoos supposed to be a half human half bird? i'd hate to imagine how they began

--I've never played a Zelda with them in it, but seeing a picture I can only guess they're akin to the Dodo bird.

16. how does wearing a blue tunic suddenly make it so that you don't drown? there's no scuba gear that comes with it of any kind, is it like a body equipment from an RPG? blue tunic increases your defense twards water by 100%?

--When he's dressed in blue, he blends in with the water. The water doesn't see him, therefore doesn't try and drown him.
 
Joined
Jan 27, 2011
here's some more logic to conclude

17. did the milk near the Hyrule castle ever get picked up?

18. why does Zant look like the aliens from Banjo Tooie?

19. super sayin chicken?

20. is Epona allergic to water or something?

21. why doesn't Ganondorf ever get dark nuts to wear lighter armor? they'd have a better chance of taking down Link if tat happened

22. what is with that female yeti? is she wrapped in a coat for eternity or does she really have no arms?

23. those pigs in Wind Waker are evil, any chance that they could be Ganondorf's pigs?

24. speaking of that what is it with Ganondorf's sick obsession with pigs? i mean i know he kind of is one but does he really have to crowd his army with them? the wolves do so much better and i'm surprised the wolves don't end up eating the pigs

25. vote Ganondorf for the next Mario Tennis

26. why does there exist a mask that somehow gives you the ability to dance without failure for hours?

27. ok so if you have that one dude in MM who you can pretty much use as a bank, how iis it that he still has your money when you go back to the first day? is he time warping too?

28. is the post man on drugs?

29. does the happy mask salesman know how to time warp too? Link always ends up right in front of him when he clearly died when the moon fell

30. with the way the moon fell it seemed to have been piercing through the ground, then by that logic shouldn't it have went down deep into the core of the earth and just destroyed te Earth? it was even flaming whe it was falling it's like what Frieza used to destroy Namek

31. nobody in Hyrule ever does anything for themselves they always seem to wait for someone to come up and then they ask for their help and Link just so happens to be the one to ask, yea he gets rewarded for what he does for them but isn't it a little much? especially that series of deliveries in OOT that you have to do to get the biggoron sword

32. did dekus become extinct?

33. Ganondorf looks massively similar to Sigma from Megaman X, ancester maybe?
 

February Eve

ZD District Attorney
Joined
Mar 21, 2010
Location
USA
Okay, these are some fun answers. I'm going to try my hand at them, though I won't answer all of them, just the ones I can come up with off the top of my head.

1. why is it that Hyrule keeps rearranging their villages and cities?


It's the map makers' fault. They keep trying to make it easier for people to read by flipping them.

2. where the hell is Kokori forest we don't see it anymore

Again, the map makers' fault. It's still there, just out of bounds.

3. why does Zelda have pictures of Peach, Yoshi, Mario and Luigi?

She met them at a fighting tournament (one that she would later join herself.)

4. why does that mask salesman have a Mario mask and where did it come from?

The mask salesman sells them as souvenirs at the fighting tournament.

5. what are redeads really supposed to be? some kinds of zombies that somehow lost their colors?

If you plug text into a language translator, and then keep switching back and forth between the original language and another, the meaning eventually becomes lost. That's what happened to redeads - they've died and been reanimated so much they've lost their original form.

8. EPONA IS INVINCABLE!

As she should be.

11. those guys in Lon Lon Ranch look way too much like Mario and Luigi, relations maybe?

They, too, are fans of the fighting tournament, to such a degree that they like to roleplay them.

12. why does everyone live in a cave in the original Zelda?

Hyrule has been revaged by war and is almost in an apocalyptic state, where everyone is forced to live underground because it's too dangerous above it.

13. what happened to Error?

I like both Shadsie's and insanity's answers. XD

14. if there's no female gorons how do they reproduce? is it like the Nameks from Dragon Ball where they puke out eggs?

There is a magical mountain somewhere that, when the temperature and pressure are just right, causes a goron to be born.

15. what the hell are the Ooccoos supposed to be a half human half bird? i'd hate to imagine how they began

The real question is, which came first, the human or the bird?

16. how does wearing a blue tunic suddenly make it so that you don't drown? there's no scuba gear that comes with it of any kind, is it like a body equipment from an RPG? blue tunic increases your defense twards water by 100%?

It's not that the tunic is blue. It's that it was darned with magic thread enchanted with a "breathe underwater" spell.

17. did the milk near the Hyrule castle ever get picked up?


Nope. And it smells, too.

20. is Epona allergic to water or something?

No, she just doesn't have a blue tunic.

22. what is with that female yeti? is she wrapped in a coat for eternity or does she really have no arms?

I'd say costume - makes her more aerodynamic for sledding.

26. why does there exist a mask that somehow gives you the ability to dance without failure for hours?

And why can't we get it for Dance Dance Revolution?

I'm going to say that much like in our universe, some people have obsessions with being the best at something, regardless of what it is. There is an equivalent, in Termina, to the Guinness Book of World Records, and someone invented the mask in order to be listed under the category "longest uninterrupted dance."

27. ok so if you have that one dude in MM who you can pretty much use as a bank, how iis it that he still has your money when you go back to the first day? is he time warping too?

The stamp on Link's hand isn't affected by going back in time. The game doesn't say it, but the balance is also on Link's hand. Link's money isn't actually there any more, but when the guy checks his hand, he thinks Link has however much in the bank as the balance says he does and adds the current amount to that total. Link is cheating the bank. :O

29. does the happy mask salesman know how to time warp too? Link always ends up right in front of him when he clearly died when the moon fell


He's a powerful mage, but it's like when your parents have the ability to do something but make you do it to build character. He makes Link do it because "it's good for him."

32. did dekus become extinct?

They're not. They're hiding in the woods outside Kokiri forest (which may or may not be the Lost Woods, depending on the map maker.)
 
Joined
Jan 27, 2011
34. Zero from Megaman X acts like what Link would act like if he could talk, you think Wily knew about Link somehow?

35. what happened to that one guy who plays the song of storms? we don't see him ever again

36.. Error looks like he's related to Grant Danisty from Castlevania 3

37. what happened to that officer goron from MM?

38. how is it that when Link is a zora he's the only one that can use his fins as weapons?

40. is Dark Link getting old or something? everytime he shows up in a game he gets easier and easier

41. why doesn't Link's sword shoot lasers anymore?
 

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