Zelda Art Four Swords of Trouble

[TreeHuggerPanda]

Hi, I just found this while cleaning out my room. I think I wrote this in English as a free write and it's pretty long, so I going to post it in installments. Enjoy!

Rated PG13 for violence and swearing. Don't have your little brother or sister hanging around while you read this.


In a sacred land of Hyrule, oh, who are we kidding? Nintendo paid me to get all “formal” and stuff, so I’ll give you the story in my own ****ing words. In a land called Hyrule, there was some kid in green who drew out the Four Swords and he split into three other people. Long story short, he only did that to impress a chick named Zelda. He defeated whatever the **** came out of the sword and eventually he decided to pull that mother****en sword out again and evil escaped, and that green dude ended up in some random village with 3 other copies of himself. Their names were Blue, Red, Green, and Vio. Together, they cause a whole lotta mischief and somehow saved the world from its doom.

“Yo, Green, can we stop by Dylan’s Candy Bar? I think I’m ready to raid that thing!” Blue asked

“No! And where the **** is Dylan’s Candy Bar, anyway?” Green asked

“Right there!” Blue pointed to a dark store right in front of them.

“We don’t have time! We have to save Zelda!” Green exclaimed

“But she wouldn’t date you anyway! She’s too good for you!” Blue protested

“So? We’ve still been friends since we were little!” Green exclaimed

“Well, I’m going in and if anyone wants to join me, fine.” Blue headed into the dark store.

“Sorry, Green, but Blue’s gotta point.” Red headed in to join Blue.

Vio sighed, “I’m going to the bookstore, wanna join me?”

“Well, I’m going to find my way out of this village and save Zelda!” Green headed north and continued to find his way to the castle.

While Green was trying to save his future girlfriend, Red and Blue got into a very sticky situation.

“I demand you tell me where the gummies are!” Red screamed at the cashier.

“But it’s a secret to everybody!” The cashier screamed at their faces

“Stop ****ing around with us and tell us where the mother****en are!” Blue screamed

“IT’S A SECRET TO EVERYBODY!” The cashier told them

“What the ****, is that supposed to be a Zelda reference, or you don’t want to tell us?” Red asked

“Zelda reference. It’s even a secret to me…” The cashier replied

“Stop bull ****ing us, and we demand to talk to your manager!” Blue screamed

“I am my own manager!” The cashier screamed

“Then where are the gummies?!” Blue and Red demanded

“I don’t know. We didn’t get a shipment on them yet!” The cashier cried

“FREEZE AND PUT YOUR HANDS ON YOUR HEAD!” The police shouted

“Who the **** are you?” Red asked

“The police of the village. You’re under arrest for raiding a store.” The police said. “We’re taking you to jail.”

 

[Zelda's_Child]

I like it! It was funny to read...
How do Red and Blue get out of jail?

 

[TreeHuggerPanda]

That's what you're suppose to wonder before I post it

---------- Post added 06-18-2010 at 02:06 PM ---------- Previous post was 06-17-2010 at 09:53 PM ----------

Update time!

While Red and Blue were getting arrested, Vio was at peace in a bookstore… not…

“But I didn’t do it!” Vio screamed at his prosecutor.

“But you were right there when she fell!” His prosecutor cried, “Haaa, it’s me, Link, Vaati.”

“Vaati? You’re that mother****er who tried to mess with us the first time!” Vio shouted

“Nooo, I’m your friend Vaati, Link. By the way, why are you in purple clothes? Are you gay? ‘Cuz the last time I checked you had a crush on Zelda.” Vaati rambled on

“First of all, Green got the four swords and he split into three other people, and I’m Vio.” Vio explained

“Oh well, see ya around Link the purple!” Vaati left Vio alone.

“IT’S VIO!” Vio screamed

“Is there a problem, sir?” The cashier asked

“No. Do you have the Ocarina of Time manga?” Vio asked

“I’m sorry sir, but that kid who just left had the last copy.” The cashier replied

“Oh my ****ing goddesses! You gotta be ****ing kidding me!” Vio screamed

“No sir, if you don’t mind waiting a month, then I can put you on hold for one!” The cashier chimed

“No thank you. I’ll just go and kill that mother****er and I’ll be on my way.” Vio ran out of the bookstore and punched Vaati in the face.“You mother****er! You stole that manga I wanted!”

“What? I didn’t buy anything!” Vaati cried in defense.

“Yeah you did! You bought the Ocarina of Time manga!” Vio screamed

“No, that guy did!” Vaati pointed to a mystery figure who was running away from the scene.

While Vio was getting the Ocarina of Time manga, Green was trying to find his way to Zelda.

“I’m going to rescue you, Zelda. Even if it’s the last mother****ing thing I’ll ever do…” Green grumbled. He kicked a rock.

“OWWWWW!” Green cried in pain. “Stupid mother****ing rock…”

“Hai!” A random little girl came up to him, “You look hurt.”

“Can’t you ****ing tell?” Green screamed at the girl

“Mei! Come back here!” A voice said, “You know you can’t talk to strangers!”

“Coming Ma! But this boy is hurt!” The little girl yelled back

“Then bring ‘em in. I can fix something up for him.” The voice replied

“Come with me!” The little girl exclaimed. Green followed her into a small hut.

“Welcome, you must be Link.” The voice said. Green saw it was an old lady.

“H-How do you know my name?” Green asked

“I know everything.” The old lady cut a ribbon.

“Uh… Okay…” Green commented. He stared at a small statue that looked like someone he knew.

“Would you like some tea?” The old lady asked

“Uh… Sure…”

“Mei, bring the tea to the boy.” Mei grabbed a tea pot and brought it to Green.

“What kind of tea is this?” Green asked

“Oh… it’s immortal tea.” The old lady replied

“Immortal Tea?” Green questioned

“A tea that makes you immortal!”

“No thank you then…” Green replied and then turned around, “It’s best for me to be on my way.”

“But do you want to save your pretty princess or not?” The old lady asked

“Of course…”

“Bring this to her. She will fall in love with you.” The old lady held out a small box

“Well, um… not thanks, I’m pretty sure if I save her, she’ll fall in love already.” Green replied

“No child, I have a feeling she will not be saved by you. It’s best to hold on to the gift.” Green took the box and was on his way.

---------- Post added 06-19-2010 at 09:56 PM ---------- Previous post was 06-18-2010 at 02:06 PM ----------

About time for an update...

While Green was trying on the journey to save Princess Zelda, Red and Blue had bigger problems to handle.

“So what the **** do we do now?” Red asked Blue, who was staring at the filly walls of the prison.

“I don’t know, but remember when Green divided the items? I still have the bombs…” Blue said shyly, revealing his bombs.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU ****IN TELL ME! WE COULD’VE DONE SOMETHING IN THE FOUR HOURS WE’VE BEEN SITTING HERE!” Red screamed at Blue. “Now give me those! I’m gonna bust us outta here!”

Red went forward to grab the bombs, but Blue kept them away from his hands.

“No, I will. ‘Cuz you’ll blow the place up. Now back away from the wall.” Blue put down a bomb and ran toward the jail bars.

KA POWIE!

“Hey what was that noise?” Someone asked

“RUN!” Blue screamed as he and Red ran away from the jail cell. They ran as swiftly as they could.

While Blue and Red were outlaws, Vio was still trying to find his Ocarina of Time manga.

“Alright you mother****er! Give me that manga right now!” Vio screamed at the mystery figure.

“No, you are unworthy of this manga if you are screaming at a lady like that!” The mystery figure yelled back. Vio caught up with her.

“SHOW ME YOUR FACE!” Vio screamed

“NEVER!” The mystery figure screamed back. Vio caught her hood and the mystery figure had deep blue eyes and long light brunette hair… it looked like it was someone familiar…

“Alright! GIVE ME THAT MANGA, NOW!” Vio screamed

“Look, Vio, it’s me, Zelda. I need the manga to get past my boredom until someone saves me…” Her voice trailed off.

“Zelda? Is that really you? Green’s been franticly searching for you!” Vio exclaimed

“Green? Oh, Link? Well, I guess I should send him a message. Will you come with me and keep watch for Vaati?” Zelda asked

“Sure.” Vio replied, “I can send the message, if you want.”

“Okay. Here” Zelda handed him a small note. “Get this to him ay-sap. If not, I will be cursed and bounded to the tower I’m held at for all of eternity.”

---------- Post added 06-20-2010 at 11:17 AM ---------- Previous post was 06-19-2010 at 09:56 PM ----------

Update time

While Vio was trying to send a message to Green, Green was still lost and had no hope of saving Zelda.

“This… is… to… hard…” Green coughed, “I… have… failed… you… Zelda… my…love…”

Green collapsed on the road. And then he woke up. It looked like he was in a different place and it didn’t seem right, Green thought.

“LINK!” A girl screamed. Green recognized it as Zelda. “You… have to save me!”

“But I can’t! I don’t know where I’m going!” Green replied

“You do! There’s a mark on your map!” Zelda exclaimed. Green pulled out his map and saw a big red mark that marked a tower.

“This is where I am. Save… me…” Zelda flew away. “I…love you, Link!”

Green woke up, (for realz) shivering and tired and continued his journey.

While Green was trying to save Zelda, Blue and Red were on the run from the police.

“So… what… do… we… do… now…?” Red asked Blue while running away from the police

“Here, give me the bow and arrows. I have an idea.” Blue held out his hand. Red handed him the bow and arrow. Blue combined them with his bombs and aimed them at the police. He let the arrows go and the police exploded.

“OH MY GOD! YOU KILLED KENNY!” Red screamed

“Who’s Kenny?” Blue asked

“I dunno, South Park reference, but you killed them!” Red screamed

“But… it stopped them, right?” Blue protested

“Yeah, but you didn’t have to kill them!” Red screamed at Blue, “I’m going to find Vio.”

“FINE! I was going to find Green!” Blue went north, while Red went to the bookstore.

 

[13foxes]

That's so funny. I really like it! XD
Oh and I love your writing style. It's mainly dialogues, not much description, not a wall of texts and easy to read. Keep up the good work!

 

[TreeHuggerPanda]

Update time!

While Red was trying to find Vio, and Blue was trying to find Green, Vio had to find Green ay-sap!

“VIO!” Someone screamed. Vio turned around. It was Blue.

“What are you doing here?” Vio asked

“Red and I were running away from the police and we got mad at each other, so we split up. I was trying to find Green and Red is trying to find you.” Blue explained.

“Well, I’m trying to find Green.” Vio replied

“Where is Green, anyway?” Blue asked

“I dunno, I have to find him and give him this note.” Vio showed Blue the note. Blue sped read through the note.

“Ah, we better get this to him quick.” Blue commented and gave the note back to Vio.

“Hai!” A little girl waved at the boys. The boys waved back and the little girl came forward to talk to them. “You two look tired, would you like to come in for tea?”

Blue and Vio looked at each other, “Sure.”

The little girl led the boys into a small hut.

“Ah, welcome dearies.” Someone said. Vio and Blue saw it was an old lady. “I bet you’re tired from your journey. Here is some tea.”

The old lady poured tea into little cups and handed them to the boys.

“Excuse me, what kind of tea is this?” Vio asked

“Immortal tea. It makes you invincible, but you cannot die and your soul belongs to me.”

“Then no thanks!” Blue and Vio put the tea down.

“Are you sure?” The old lady asked as if nothing was wrong.

“Yes we are sure. Mind telling us where we are?” Blue asked

“Oh, yes, you are in the outskirts of ERROR Village. Somewhat near Lon Lon Ranch.” The old lady replied

“Error Village?” Vio questioned, “Never heard of that place…”

“It’s ERROR Village. It’s a village that was taken out of the game, but Nintendo spared our lives and let us live as a secret village only after beating the game you can visit.” The old lady explained

“Thanks you for your wisdom, but look at the time! We should get going.” Vio and Blue ran away from the hut and was still trying to find Green.

While Vio and Blue were trying to find Green, Green was still trying to find his way to the tower, but there were very minor problems.

“OWWW!” Green screamed in pain. He realized it was a wound from the rock. He screamed in pain and fell down.

“GREEN!” Two people exclaimed and began to run towards Green.

“WHO’S THERE?” Green demanded

“It’s us- Vio and Blue!” Vio exclaimed

“Oh, can you do anything about this wound?” Green showed Vio the wound.

“I guess you could just cover it up with something and put an antibiotic.” Vio replied

“Where are you going, Green?” Blue asked

“To save Zelda, duh.” Green replied, “Wanna help?”

“Sure, whatever.” Blue and Vio said

“Okay, get me a Band-Aid and some antibiotics in the next town, then meet me up at this tower.” Green showed Blue and Vio the red mark.

“Okay.” Blue and Vio went running off to the next town.

“Heh heh… That’ll get rid of them for a while.” Green took out his picture of Zelda. “I’ll save you…”

 

[Beeker]

Awesome story so far, THP! Love your writing, it's got a lot of humor in it, and I love the references.
If only the story was actually told like this.

And I'm completly seeing myself as Vio right now, searching for his Ocarina manga(MUST.GET.MANGAS.)

 

[TreeHuggerPanda]

Sorry guys, I was pretty busy doing some graphics favors for my friends, that I kinda took a few days off from typing this. Enjoy!

While Green continues on his journey and Vio and Blue journey to get a Band-Aid and antibiotics, Red had no clue where he was going.

“Excuse me,” Red asked the cashier of the bookstore. “Have you seen anyone that looks like me, only with purple clothes?”

“Well, there was this one guy. He asked for the Ocarina of Time manga.” The cashier replied

“Thank you. Do you know where he went?” Red asked

“I think he went to find his friend who he was talking to.” The cashier replied

“Thank you.” Red left the store.

“This is hopeless. I’ll never find Vio…” Red mumbled to himself and sat down on the ground.

“Hai!” Someone waved at Red. He looked up and saw it was a little girl.

“What’s your name?” Red asked

“Mei.” The little girl replied, “Are you lost?”

“Yes, I need to find someone who looks exactly like me, only with green clothes.” Red explained

“I saw someone with green clothes that looks like you!” Mei piped up

“Really? Where did he go?” Red asked

“On his way to a huge tower.” Mei replied

“Thanks little girl!” Red got up and started to walk. “Wait, which way did he go?”

“That way!” Mei pointed north. Red turned around and went north.

“If you see my ma, tell her I’m running away!” The little girl called.

Strange girl, Red thought as he walked on the dirt path.

“Hello boy.” And old lady called, “Have you seen my Mei?”

“Mei? I saw a little girl running away from home…” Red replied

“That’s probably her. Will you go get her and talk sense into her?” The old lady asked

“Okay…” Red turned around and searched for Mei.

“Little girl!” Red screamed

“Yes?” Mei appeared in front of Red.

“AHHH!” Red screamed like a girl, “Don’t scare me like that!”

“Sorry.” Mei giggled

“You’re mama want you to go home.” Red explained

“No! I don’t wanna go back to that old lady! She’s MEAN!” Mei cried

“But she’s looking for you and she looks $!@!ed.” Red replied

“Why don’t you like her?” Red asked

“Because she makes me do all of the chores around the house and she’s not even my real mama. She found me on a walk one day and took me in. I want to find my real mama.” Mei explained

“… I’ll help you find her. Do you remember anything about your ma?” Red asked

“No, except she had a beautiful singing voice.” Mei replied.

“Why don’t you come with me and we can try and find some more information on your ma.” Red began to walk north with the little girl following him.

 

[TreeHuggerPanda]

Please note that I only read the Four Sword Adventures Manga, and the locations are not exact or correct. I just came up with the first village or whatever in my head.

While Red had a little girl following him, Vio and Blue were trying to find a few things for Green.

“Where’s the next town, Vio?” Blue asked as they were walking

“Village of the Blue Maiden.” Vio replied, “It shouldn’t take that long…”

They saw a tiny village up ahead.

“Come on!” Blue ran ahead of Vio, “Let’s go!”

Blue ran and ran, until he got to the store.

“HEY! Wait up!” Vio screamed as he was walking

“Come on Slow Poke!” Blue yelled back. He entered the store.

“Hi, welcome to the Village of the Blue Maiden store, how may I help you?” The cashier asked.

“Um, do you have any antibiotics cream and band aids?” Blue asked

“Actually, we just sold our last box of band aids and antibiotics cream to that person in the cloak.” The cashier replied

“Thank you.” Blue followed the person in the cloak

“HEY!” Blue screamed as he walked behind the person in the cloak. He/She didn't reply.

“YOU THERE!” Blue screamed. He pulled on the person in the cloak’s hood. She had deep blue eyes and long light brunette hair… it looked like it was someone familiar…

“Oh thank the goddess!” The girl said, “Link!”

“I’m not Link- I’m Blue.” Blue replied

“Oh, well, Blue, where’s Li- I mean Green?” The girl asked

“Who are you?” Blue asked

“First, where is Green?” The girl asked

“No. First, who are you?!” Blue demanded

“It’s me, Zelda. Where’s Green?”

“Oh he’s on his way to a tower.” Blue replied, “Can I have those Band-Aids and the antibiotics cream?”

“Oh, sure.” Zelda handed Blue Band-Aids and antibiotics cream. And Blue took it from her hands.

“Thanks.” Blue ran toward Vio, who was on top of a hill to the path towards the store.

 

[TreeHuggerPanda]

About time for an update...

While Blue and Vio were on their way back to Green, Green encountered someone you wouldn’t expect to see.

“Oh my ****in goddesses!” Green just realized there was someone following him.

“Hello Link.” Green turned around and saw it was Dark Link. “I heard you like Zelda.”

“And I heard you leik mudkipz.” Green replied.

“Haha, very funny.” Dark Link said in a sarcastic voice, “Where is she? She needs the hero she deserves.”

“Oh haha, YOU’RE going to save her?” Green started to laugh his *** off, “OMFG! YOU a hero!”

“Shut the **** up! She needs a true hero!” Dark Link said in defense

“So? I saved Hyrule and her, let’s see…” Green began to count the Legend of Zelda games, “15+ times… and how many did Dark Link saved Hyrule and Zelda? Hm?”

“Well… I was a boss… and a final boss… and your evil twin!”

“You’re my twin?” Green said alarmed

“I am. The other colored Link are just copies of you, but I’m you as a ****in shadow! So it counts as a twin!” Dark Link said proudly

“Whatever, I’m going to get to her first.” Green began to run toward the tower

“Oh no you’re NOT!” Dark Link screamed and snapped his fingers. A sand beast came right out of the ground. “Enjoy Molgera!”

Dark Link disappeared in thin air. And Green screamed, “CURSE YOU DARK LINK!”

And Green prepared for battle.

While Green was out battling Molgera, Red Link was babysitting a little girl.

“So do you have a mama?” The little girl, Mei, asked

“I don’t remember, as long as I can remember, I was raised by my dad.” Red replied

“I don’t know who my daddy is.” Mei admitted. “That old hag-.”

“Watch your language, missy!” Red pinched Mei on the shoulder.

“OW! THAT HURT!” Mei pouted and rubbed the spot where Red pinched her.

“Watch your language!” Red scolded

“Fine, that old lady said that my daddy was a no good bum and that he was really sweet on my mama, but he turned bitter and dumped me at the old lady’s.” Mei explained. Red couldn’t believe a little girl went through all of that in her life.

“We must be near Village of the Blue Maiden.” Red said as they approached a village covered in blue

“Why is it called “Village of the blue maiden?” Mei asked. Red decided not to answer that question, since it was stupid anyway.

“I’m tired… can’t we book a night at the inn and rest?” Mei complained

“No, besides, in the Zelda world, we almost never sleep! How can you say that?!”

“But I’m tirrrrrrrrrrred!” Mei complained

This is going to be a long journey… Red thought

 

[Zelda's_Child]

LOL keep writing I love it. don't let me down now!

 

[Beeker]

This is getting really awesome! Keep it up!

 

[Zelda64]

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