For me, I always assumed the pre-order ONLY meant you were putting down a payment for the GAME... not any other bonuses (assuming physical goods & not digital which should not be limited in quantity until the redemption period online is over, blah), because those supplies are always hugely limited in every store. To get your bonus, you had to pre-order & make sure you got there physically to ensure any other bonuses, as stores only got a limited quantity. Usually only like 5-10 of those things, I've noticed. Massive "collectors" stuff with statues, even less so, a location may only get like 1-3 of those huge boxes depending on where you live, if any, depending on their suppliers.
I never assume I am going to get my bonus extra unless I show up extremely early & then they still somehow tell me I can't get it when nobody else has shown up. I've never assumed I HAVE to get any bonuses unless it's a download code that is SUPPOSED to be inside my game & for some mysterious reason isn't... due to Gamestop I know removing those in some cases. Confirmed from my roommate who used to work there, they WILL do that & that majorly sucks. It especially was common with 3DS Pokemon games with bonuses. However... here's the thing. Sometimes employees just do not care. They set aside stuff randomly, say, the 20 units of stickers+keyring they get to 20 people & the 50 other people who pre-ordered just get their game because that's all they got! OR... they hand them out to first come, first served, as you said. I've certainly shown up a few times for a game, didn't even know they had a bonus, & an employee gave it to me anyway. This happened with Pokemon a lot. I never preordered them since they always were in huge supply where I live due to the popularity of Pokemon. I also didn't really think about how I was functionally "taking away" someone's pre-order bonus because an employee shoved a journal, Lugia figurine or sticker sheet in my bag when I was buying my game a day or two after release. Sometimes stuff just happens? I dunno.
Anyway I never think that a pre-order absolutely guarantees me any sort of physical goods bonus because that is just kind of silly to assume to me personally. Maybe it guaranteed it like 10+ years ago, but absolutely not now with now limited those always seem to be at any location? I'm sorry you missed out.