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Ah so that’s how you kids today look things up, I’ll make him an entry in my encyclopedia.

Who the heck is Fred Rogers

What the heck. I was in a good mood today, but six times in two hours you marvel at how depressed I look. Not only marveling but pointing out to those around us “Wow isn’t he just SO depressed??” I stopped talking to you somewhere in the middle of that but somehow you took that as incentive to...

I like how I've been buying eggnog every year even though I dont like it on the off chance that maybe I was stupid all those other times I think I'm acquiring the taste lol

Welp, time to move. :ugh:

You know you’ve had a long day when you look down and see your belt buckle somehow made it through a loop and is now on the side of your pants instead of the front.

Ban them :D

Hey Doc I’ve got an idea! Join this random contest I found and show them how easy it is to wreck your life in smash! :) https://zeldadungeon.net/forum/threads/super-smash-bros-ultimate-custom-stage-tournament.65145/

Do real life princesses watch Disney movies and think now why can’t my true love just fall out the sky like that? :suspicious:

I woke up in the middle of the night, thought “OH NO I FORGOT TO SET MY ALARM” set my alarm, and then remembered as I was falling back asleep that I hadn’t set one cause I didn’t need an alarm today. :fpalm:

Why am I that one person that writes haikus when they’re having a bad day.

Tfw you’re at work rushing to pick up broken glass and you think wow I didn’t even cut myself and you look down and see your hand is red.

So I was just battling Uumuu in the Pantheon of the Sage and I somehow defeated it, except I wanted to grab some soul so I slashed a jellyfish and naturally got myself blown to bits. But apparently the game didn’t care cause it sent me to the next battle with full health! XD

I finally finished all three paths in Fates! :D Only took two years and about three hundredish hours. Now gotta go get Echoes before Three Houses gets here.

So many games, so little motivation. Why can’t Dark Souls beat itself?

Christmas is real, lost sixty dollars for half an hour but a Walmart worker found it! :D

That’s just the way you prefer your cocaine. :right: How hard was it to quit? I think I should get help.

I eat ice cream and drink chocolate milk the way other people drink alcohol and do drugs.

My nose is sore. HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN? >_<

Your taste in music sucks.

I hate it when I’m taking a shower and I can’t remember if I already washed my hair. >_<

Kind of wish I could’ve skipped the six hours of agony and just thrown up at the start.

Oooh that line from Good King Wenceslas, the snow layed roundabout, deep and crisp and even. Still not very funny but there ya go.

This was a triumph, I'm making a note here: "HUGE SUCCESS" It's hard to overstate my satisfaction. :D

Now whenever I see piles of dead branches I think FIRE ARROW FIRE ARROW FIRE ARROW.

I think this is what being microwaved is like...

I wake up almost every morning with my hair poofing like a roosters tail and the only thing that helps is to take a hair dryer to it, though everyones so used to it I rarely bother unless it's epically bad.

-''Accidentally'' drops 398 rupees at deus's feet and keeps walking-

There was a time when people didn't have fans or ice buckets O-O

I have no idea how past generations survived without air conditioning.