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I got it! Anywho: ^ Yep < Is suffering of malaria V Is getting on to the bus that's going to take them back to Beelzebub (in honor of Purple_Rupee's reference)

^ Snap < Is not excited about Anchorman 2 V Is Ron Burgundy

^ Nope. < Is a member of the Church of Scientology. V Names their rashes after the cast members of the Brady Bunch. Ha. Super Saiyan Bowel Movements.

^ Lives in Moldova < Lives in Bandar Seri Begowan, Brunei V Lives in Kevin Spacey's basement

^ Leaves survivors < Lets the children escape V Has ischemic bowel

^ Yup < Loves macaroni and cheese V Has never heard Frank Sinatra (I hope that's a lie)

^ Lied (how's that for a paradox?) < Isn't the best around; things are going to keep him down V Has a pet cockatrice

^Yup. < Will probably stop spamming the forum games in the foreseeable future. V Hates me

^ Lied about the tacos < Doesn't really want a taco V Won't give me a taco if I ask really nice

^ Definitely didn't intend for his last lie to be about Trio the Punch < Hates Luigi's Mansion V Burns down orphanages

^ Is as cool as his arch-rival < Took the cookie from the cookie jar V Has green hair and can therefore screw the rules

^ Has a maid from Singapore as a pet < Is unmoved by all of the people permanently leaving ZD V Is Chad from accounting

^ Lied with his last statement. < Is currently in Mogadishu. V Hates BDSM

^ Told the truth when he was supposed to lie (my statement has made me a hypocrite) < Is not currently more bored than any person on Earth V Likes leather pants

^ Never misuses the word 'Boss' as a gerund, when it is in fact only correct when used as a noun < Hates kicking puppies V Has leprosy

^ Is cooler than me < Isn't the coolest individual ever V Loves the lyrical work of Corky from Life Goes On.